Heart Broken!

So I have only gone to class for three days so far. Already I am exhausted and have no energy and my pain has reached an unbearable level. I have even been using my chair at school and having help getting to class, yet I am still worn out! When I am not at school I am in bed, can hardly do Homework as I am just worn out from going to school. So after much waiting to see how it goes, I went and saw my doctor. He put me on a different med. for pain to see if it helps. If it doesn't he brought up the much dreaded thought I was thinking may have to be done.... dropping out of school. It is just heart breaking! I want to do this so bad and I am mentally there, but my body is physically not there. I cried as he mentioned it. He told me I see this is something that means so much to you, so he is going to try and help which I am so thankful for! I couldn't ask for a better doc! Its the second day on the med. and I am waiting to see how it goes. I am feeling a lot better then I was. Not nearly as much pain, the test will be next week! I just don't want lupus to win! Quitting is letting lupus win and I don't want that! My doctor said that lupus is just another part of my life and you just have to balance it with the rest of your life. That is one of the hardest things to do!! I am just sick of living off of pills just to live a some what normal life!!

I can feel your disappointment and frustration, Louters. I wish things were easier for you. If in fact you are unable to continue with school, you can still pursue your education either part time or online. It is not the same experience, but you can graduate and get your degree. I am glad you have a kind doctor, too -- that always helps. All the best to you.

I very much agree with 'dancermom' IF you have to leave school you can explore on line education. Thank goodness you have a good doctor. Best Wishes to you. I do have an understanding of your situation.

Kaz xo

I can understand and relate,when hit with this disease it has been a big adjustment for me too,I learn to do things that need to be done first and res ,do a little bit more than rest,You have LUPUS ,LUPUS HAVE YOU,I FNALLY GOT A ANSWER FROM THE JOB I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR SINCE I HAVE BEEN LAID OFF THE EARLY PART OF THIS YEAR A CAREER NOT A JOB AND even tough the hiring process is dreadfull I have a 25 percent chance of winning but if I dont try I willnot have any chance of winning,I just have to pace myself and know that God loves me and he will design the right job for me that I can handle this lupus,and you will have to take your time ,I dont know how long u have been going to school,but LUpus is more than a adjustment it is apart of our lives till we die.DONT Give Up

I have been in your shoes. I have even been doing online school to stay afloat on my education. I feel for you and understand but you must not give up or give in to this disease. As you put it you can’t let it win.

Awww, Louters, what a lousy thing to be happening. I have been thinking about you and wondering how your life has been. I am not on here much anymore but I do think of everyone here. You are so young and I know that I was lucky that lupus did not manifest in me when I was young. Prayers for you and I hope that you get better soon. Gentle hugs, Reet

Prayers for you for healing, strength and peace!

I will start off by saying I am not trying to scam anyone promise :slight_smile: A ohsu doctor put my sister on a.m.p floracel and she has been in remission ever since (that was 5 yrs ago). If she stops it comes back. It’s a natural product. I hope your situation improves. Take care, Jeff cox

I’m so sorry. I had semesters where I could only take 3 classes because I was so exhausted. I think I had maybe 1 semester where I could take the full 5. It took me 10 years to finish my bachelor’s because I had to take semesters off when the lupus would flare. My doctors did their best to keep me stable but sometimes it just didn’t work. Hang in there, I know it’s tough. Provigil helped me quite a bit with the fatigue. Without it I doubt I would’ve made it through. It’s actually a drug for narcolepsy but it works really well for CFS. You might try asking your doc about it. It doesn’t take away pain but it really helps with brain fog as well as fatigue. Good luck! Gentle hugs, Annemarie

Hang in there hon! I'm thinking of you and rooting for you. I agree that you should look into part-time college (I've done that, for financial reasons rather than physical ones) or online classes. ::hugs tight:: You can do this, even if it doesn't quite happen like you planned.

I'm so sorry. Been there, done that, got the T shirt. *grin*. I had to finish school through home study. Online studies might be great for you. There may be a couple of classes that you need to be there for, but maybe a couple of classes a week will be easier. Most universities offer online classes as well, or you can find accredited courses by searching online that your school would accept the credits for. My sister has lupus and she had to take it slowww. It took her many years to become a psychologist because she had to take a bit at a time. We learn to do things differently, but we still can do many things we dreamed of.

Best wishes,


Thank you! I really appreciate all the love and support! It is hard as not everyone knows what I am going through so to come on here and vent feels so good! Lots of tears have been shed this week. I am currently only taking 3 classes, the one is not offered online the other two are but I would need tutors for them anyway so I would be on campus anyways so why do online if I am going to be going anyways? I am also a virtual learner so online is in ways just as hard or harder. I am going to try this week and see how it goes. Thankfully today I get to babysit my nephew so thats going to lift my spirits!!! :D

Its been said before and I agree ...I feel so badly for the younger women who develop Lupus. At least I had gotten through school, been married, had a good start on my career, and about to have a child when it reared its ugly little head in my life. Balancing school , work , and an adult life is hard enough. I will say a prayer that God gives you strength so you can continue your education. Good luck and God Bless

Bless your heart! I agree with you about this support group! While I rarely post much myself, I do read posts of others on a regular basis. It is amazing how much it helps to just read what others are dealing with AND the responses of others. Always such great support. Days that I am struggling more than most, to find a place that there are so many others that truly know what you are going through is absolutely wonderful…a true online support group.

Louters - you will be added to my prayer list specifically asking Him to assist you, walk with you, and even carry you through this semester.

God bless to everyone with this support group.

Hi! I’m new to the site, but I, too, feel badly for you. Is it possible to organize your classes so that they only meet MWF or T-TH? In my experience, I can function moderately well if I only schedule activities every other day, with a day in between to rest. If I schedule something several days in a row, I am exhausted and in serious pain by day three. I have no idea what you use for pain meds, but my wonderful pain management doctor put me on Butrans patches. It keeps medication at a constant rate in your bloodstream so that your pain is not going up and down like it does when you use pain pills. Having pain meds consistent in my system is extremely helpful in helping me to function well. I certainly hope you are able to make your situation work for you. Lupus robs us of too many experiences in our lives without robbing us of our education, too!

You can get tutors online as well. You say you are a virtual learner. Everything online is referred to as "the virtual world", so wouldn't being a virtual learner be a benefit? I know you will find a way to do it easier. Every campus has a counselor for disabled people, to offer options for their specific needs so they will succeed. Check that out too. Hang in there and change things so they work for you.

Thanks all! I am only there MWF this semester I was hoping for TTh but my one class is only offered on MWF. I am working with the disability office and plan to talk to her more on Monday. I love being back and it feels wonderful but I don’t know if I can continue. …

I know exactly how u feel i went through the same thing its hard to make a decision and in part put yourself in another category of human but personally i have deceided to take a year off and regain strenght and in that time maybe try online school. You have to find your bounderies and not blame yourself

So sorry that you are going through this. I will be praying that the new medicine will be effective and that you are able to find a balance and you are able to stay in school. So thankful that you have a supportive doctor that understands how important this is to you. Keep your head up and stay positive, it may not all happen like you thought it would but I know that it well all work out. Good luck!

Blessings and hugs,


My heart goes out to you Louters. I can't imagine the emotional turmoil you are in. I know what you mean about not wanting Lupus to win.....it won't, if you can try to find a balance for your life. Sit down with your family and see what they can do to help you. Maybe you will have to cut down to only two classes. And, not worry how long it will take you to finish your education. Just take each day as it comes. That's all we can do anyway. Good Luck and feel better. Try to beat the pain.