Young and Dating with Lupus

I am in dilemma, I am in 30’s have had Lupus and MCTD since my early 20’s. How do you date with this issue. When do you disclose? When a person finds out I have Lupus they are in shock. I look perfectly fine, athletic, active etc.

Im 23. When i was dating (im married now) i would often disclose within the first 3 dates. It gives me time to feel them out if they can handle it and would be a good partner but lets them get to know me not my disease.
I just kinda say theres something important about me you should know. Have you ever heard of lupus? Well i have it. And then i answer and explain whats important (how it affects me and my day to day).
Ive found its very hard to find someone who can really handle being with someone so bad theyre disabled and who understands i have more bad days than good.
Good luck
Mary