So it was another weekend with my girlfriends and my brother from another mother. :) They will come over to my place and I will just lay on the couch and we will watch movies. Its so nice to have company over! They are the best medicine I could ask for, the sunshine and laughter they bring! And if its a good day we might do some other things, like shopping... ;)
We were talking and they started talking to me about me and lupus. I had posted a picture on FB that said I dont look sick but... and it talked about things that we deal with and how we feel. They went on to talk about how they try and talk to their co-workers, friends and family about me and lupus. They said I cant believe people think this is all in your head, They went on to say we see your body give out on you and you cant walk, the exhaustion, the pain you deal with we see it in you. I was shocked to see how in tune they are to me. I thought I hid it from them, not that I am ashamed but I didnt want them to worry or feel bad or sorry for me. I struggle with the idea of getting the "im sick so do for me attitude". I started to cry and thank them for being so amazing to me and loving me in spite of my challenges, I know its not always easy having to load and unload a wheel chair many times a day. I told them without you I would have no life. I couldn't go shopping and do the few normal things a young adult would do. I still think how did I get blessed with such amazing friends? I still tear up to see how much they do for me.
My brother from another mother is the sweetest guy ever! He just loves to help me and is always making sure I am ok. We went to the mall yesterday and so of course I needed my chair so I could get around and he had no problem pushing me and going to all the girlie stores. For my birthday he wrote me a sweet poem and told me that the wheel-chair didn't matter and that I was still his beautiful sister and no matter what happens I will always be beautiful. I just lost it as he read it to me!
I know it has only been a little over a year since being diagnosed and I am still learning so much about living with lupus and struggling with my bad days. But having friends that love me any way and deal with the baggage I bring with helps me to keep going! How thankful and blessed I feel!!! :D
