Really starting to like this guy… And i know that he likes me too… Today i have just shown him what having lupus really looks like… Yes i’ve shown him some of my medical files and photos. I could regret this forever or i could just be hopeful that nothing will change after this one brave move. I would rather be honest today and lose him now than pretend and lose him someday because he could not withstand living lupus with me… just venting out guys like a one scarred butterfly here. How to overcome rejection because of lupus or any chronic illness… i know im being paranoid but just wanted to hear insights from you guys…
I think you’re being very brave and I commend you for that. Anyone worth staying with will try to understand your illness. If you’re rejected, I suppose it’s better to find out sooner than later that you’re not with the right person. Hang in there and try to keep the faith that what’s meant to be will work out in your favor.
I know the not knowing how someone will react to your illness is scary but I’m a firm believer that if he is the one you are meant to be with then it won’t matter. If he’s truly the one for you then he’ll stick by you through thick or thin. My husband and I will celebrate our 44th anniversary soon and during that time I’ve gone through over a dozen surgeries of various kinds, been ill and unable to do simple housework many days, given birth to 5 boys, 2 of which died shortly after birth. And yet he’s stuck by me through all of it. If this is to be your forever partner then he will be there for you, if not then it’s better finding out now. Best of luck dear friend.
I think you’re brave for doing that, I was in the same situation about two years ago when I told my boyfriend I had lupus and I was so scared he was going to run for the hills but we are still going strong. Now sometimes it isn’t easy because he doesn’t understand the illness fully but thats why we need to teach them and he learns everyday. If he really cares for you, he will stick by you. Good luck
Way to go girl. I was just talking to my gf about this. I’m meeting new people and I never know when to tell them about my disease. It’s scary because I fear that I’ll be rejected without even getting a real chance. My Girls just reminded me that if they can’t handle it you’d rather know from the beginning. It’s sad that lupus is already a big burden to me physically now it’s affecting other parts of my life. Ugh. Good luck!
I would say tell him sooner rather than later. You have nothing to lose, this is you and your life. He needs to either accept and support you or walk away now. I told my now Fiance that I have Lupus on our first date and we are getting married this October! :)
It’s good to be up front in the beginning. You would hate to get down the road and find out he can’t handle it and leave you with a broken heart. I found out down the road because I was blind to the little things said and done that should have been red flags, my heart was broken. There are men out there who can handle us butterflies, God has already blessed you with them or removed the ones who could not to make room for the ones who can. I wish your relationship success! Keep us posted I love happy endings, God bless
I think you did good. Aside from the fact that we have lupus it’s 100% correct to start any relationship with honesty even a friendship. I whole heartily. Wish he takes it like a man and accepts you the way you are Best of Luck: )
I avoided relationships for many years because I could not imagine marriage for me. At 72, I married the love of my life.
He is a jewel...at first I though he did not really understand Lupus...now I know he does and does not care. He loves the good days and lets me sleep my bad days...he loves to read and garden...plus he has many sports he loves to watch or play. So he can entertain himself.
Often he goes to the doctors with me. I think you did the right thing...I waited longer before I told my sweetie as I thought
we would just be friends. I think certain people are our angels.
Hello guys! Thank you so much for your encouragement! Ive waited for days to reply to you all so I can update you. I am happy that he is still around and more attentive than ever! He makes me laugh all the time and always listens to my lupus stories and silly jokes! he also encourages me to get fit now that im off the prednisone. He is so fit that I am also motivated to watch my diet and get back to exercising. I hope this is the start of something more than friendship! I know he likes me and i like him more now! Thank you guys for sharing your stories and you are all an inspiration to me. In sickness and in health it is!
i know im being paranoid but just wanted to hear insights from you guys…