Life story time

As my hearing approaches (60 days!), I was told to start writing down things that I go through on a daily basis; pains, problems, etc.

So, I guess I'll start with how I figured out I had lupus. In 2004, I was having severe fatigue, followed by severe pain in my knees, especially with stairs. Lupus runs in the family, so we had an ANA test done, and it came back positive. Now I know that doesn't always mean anything, because I've also had negative ANA's, usually in times when my lupus is being calm. It seems directly related to my stress levels and/or other symptoms and flare ups. Of course there was also the butterfly rash on my face as a dead give away. I did physical therapy for my knees, and it did help for a while.

High school was a series of good/bad cycles. I was very active in the music community, partly because I'm not that coordinated, and partly because I couldn't keep up with the physical demands. Not that marching band wasn't physically demanding. There were times when it was really hard. But mostly I was having a hard time with my immune system, almost constantly sick, and the fatigue made it hard to get out of bed sometimes, and impossible most times. My school record was pretty awful, usually missing more days/classes than I attended. Over all, most of my teachers were understanding, or tried to be. One of the worst things that happened in high school was in 2006, my hip started hurting out of the blue, and I left school early because it was so hard to walk to the classes. At the doctors, they ended up giving me an injection in my left hip, which temporarily helped. It stayed a dull but persistent pain for quite some time after. My hips have always been one of the most painful things joint wise (pretty equal to my knees). In my senior year, although at the time I never put two and two together, my left shoulder (yeah its weird, but a lot of my problems come on my left side) started hurting so bad I couldn't participate in band anymore (for a few weeks, but intermittently after that it hurt). Academically, I was smart. Not top 10 smart, but top 25% smart. I bet if I could have been more persistent I could have done better. I almost failed because of my inability to be in gym class of all things. Many essays on useless things later, I was allowed to graduate, with regents honors, and a fine arts diploma.

Then came the ever important college. Which I've already written a little about. I did my classes online so that I was not exposed to excess germs, and so that when I was having a bad day and couldn't get off the couch, I could stay in bed. It was still hard, and I ended up having to quit with not many classes left. The stress of the classes caused many flare ups, but one in particular made my heart rate very fast, I'm talking over 200 fast. I spent my whole valentines day in the emergency room while they tried to lower my heart rate. By 8pm, they sent me home on some medicine to help keep it down, but it didn't work very well. I haven't returned, and don't know when/if I will yet.

At the time, I had been working as well as doing classes, and that probably was a bad decision, but I was 20, and wanted (still do) to be independent and make something of myself like all my peers have been doing. I had an apartment, a room mate, loving pet fish, and a couple friends who were away at college. I was doing what I thought was what everyone my age was doing. I failed to remember that lupus has limitations. More like I tried to push them, and lupus pushed back. I have tried steroids, plaquenil, and other things like physical therapy to try and control the symptoms.

Shortly after my heart incident, my legs started to swell and bruise, and it was the worst pain I have ever felt in my life. I couldn't walk, or stand, or even touch my legs without being in tears. My doctors tried everything from antibiotics to steroids and potassium supplements to make them better, and in the end, the only thing that helped was strong ibuprofen, and rest. It took 6 weeks total before they were "resolved," as my charts say. But I still have problems with my legs, especially poor circulation, pain when standing, restless legs while sitting, and there are marks left on my legs from the swelling. It was awful. I couldn't even get to the bathroom by myself, I couldn't get dressed by myself because my pants touching my legs was excruciating. It was September, so the warm ish weather helped so I could usually wear shorts and a sweatshirt to keep warm. My boss was not understanding what so ever. Even with a doctors note he continually contacted me to ask when I could return to work. After a couple weeks, he told me that he was going to fire me since I could not work. This was just the icing on the cake in my list of bad things that year. However, my boss learned the store was closing, and decided to "do me a favor" and lay me off so I could collect unemployment. I had no idea that it was going to interfere with my disability case, because my lawyer said it wasn't a problem. But it was.

After my legs, I developed Raynaud's in my fingers and toes especially.

I have never wanted anything more than to be able to do what everyone else my age can do. I cant go out on the weekends, or even go to the movies sometimes. If its not pain in my joints, or fatigue, or being sick, its my depression keeping me home. I have lost so much from having this disease, and some people think im just being lazy and don't want to go get a job. that couldn't be farther from the truth. I had high hopes and aspirations of being a forensic scientist, or a music therapist, neither of which I have been able to accomplish. All my peers have graduated college, are starting families, and dream jobs, and here I am, still fighting to prove that I have this sickness. Is it any wonder my stress levels have been consistent, and lupus flare ups persistent? And that doesn't even include the fact that I also have segmental neurofibromatosis.

I just want to be normal, but I cant.

Normal is nothing but a setting on the dryer. I am sorry you are struggling so much! I find myself having similar frustrations. However, my story just started in 2013. I am 37 and I went to school and work for the last 12 years working on my degree. I have a Masters in SW and last year I got sick with lupus. Now I question everything I fought so hard for. I had to resign from the best job I ever had because I am now unable to work. I am in pain everyday and feel so frustrated since this is outside of my control. This is outside any of our control. I almost died a few months again and the doctors told my family I had a 50/50 chance of living. I made it but like you, I feel like this disease is taking everything. I know that
We can turn this into a positive somehow! I know how alone I have felt and it seems like you have too! Our attitude is half the battle and I know I am fighting not being depressed, but I have to believe that this isn’t it. That there will be better days ahead. Everything happens for a reason and we can bring something good out of this ugly disease. I have to believe that for you and me. I wish you the best. I wish we could somehow all meet and get together at times to encourage each other. Take care and know you aren’t alone. Kari

You are normal , just different <3 from others without lupus. I have made peace with the fact a lot of my "Dreams " I have to change to accommodate lupus. I have so desperately wanted to own my own business a bookstore … I sell used books on Amazon it is very small sales like 3 books a month and sometimes that is too much. I wanted also to train dogs for the blind (this is at different times in my life) I now dog sit my daughters dogs. Much different from my original dreams however I can manage this so far. If you can let go and heal your body then look for smaller more manageable dreams!!
I wish the very best for you and send you a big hug
Terri

Josie,

What a story you have. Seems like you have documented your issues very well. Do you have a disability attorney going with you to the hearing or are you going it alone?

All the best,

LupanCatwoman

The only thing that has kept me going is Faith and Prayer, I truly believe He has A reason, in His Glory, I pray for you!

Kari,

I love it - Normal is a setting on the dryer How true.

Kari said:

Normal is nothing but a setting on the dryer. I am sorry you are struggling so much! I find myself having similar frustrations. However, my story just started in 2013. I am 37 and I went to school and work for the last 12 years working on my degree. I have a Masters in SW and last year I got sick with lupus. Now I question everything I fought so hard for. I had to resign from the best job I ever had because I am now unable to work. I am in pain everyday and feel so frustrated since this is outside of my control. This is outside any of our control. I almost died a few months again and the doctors told my family I had a 50/50 chance of living. I made it but like you, I feel like this disease is taking everything. I know that
We can turn this into a positive somehow! I know how alone I have felt and it seems like you have too! Our attitude is half the battle and I know I am fighting not being depressed, but I have to believe that this isn't it. That there will be better days ahead. Everything happens for a reason and we can bring something good out of this ugly disease. I have to believe that for you and me. I wish you the best. I wish we could somehow all meet and get together at times to encourage each other. Take care and know you aren't alone. Kari

Josie,

Writing things down is a great way to prepare for your hearing. Keep focus on this and you'll do just fine,'


Thank you, I really wish that I could meet up with some of you all too. That is partly what lead me here. I was originally looing for a support group to join and meet others with my problems, but where I live there aren't any around me so I took to the internet to find some lupies who understand. Im sorry to hear you have had some bad luck, I've noticed that my lupus runs in cycles and especially feeds off my depression and stress. But you cant always avoid stress, and sometimes trying to avoid stress is just as stressful! Im happy you are still with us, I know the feeling of being told something awful is happening inside you and you cant control it, just hope for the best. Good luck to you, and may you have more good days than bad.
Kari said:

Normal is nothing but a setting on the dryer. I am sorry you are struggling so much! I find myself having similar frustrations. However, my story just started in 2013. I am 37 and I went to school and work for the last 12 years working on my degree. I have a Masters in SW and last year I got sick with lupus. Now I question everything I fought so hard for. I had to resign from the best job I ever had because I am now unable to work. I am in pain everyday and feel so frustrated since this is outside of my control. This is outside any of our control. I almost died a few months again and the doctors told my family I had a 50/50 chance of living. I made it but like you, I feel like this disease is taking everything. I know that
We can turn this into a positive somehow! I know how alone I have felt and it seems like you have too! Our attitude is half the battle and I know I am fighting not being depressed, but I have to believe that this isn't it. That there will be better days ahead. Everything happens for a reason and we can bring something good out of this ugly disease. I have to believe that for you and me. I wish you the best. I wish we could somehow all meet and get together at times to encourage each other. Take care and know you aren't alone. Kari

It is true, I have been hanging on to dreams I know aren't possible at least right now, and that makes things harder on myself. I have tried to let go, tried to find a different dream, and been told that until I stop looking, ill never figure it out. Im finding this to be very correct. The more I try and figure out what I can do with myself, the worse my health has become. I need to stop thinking about my future so much and just worry about getting my present in order. Thank you for reminding me that the present is sometimes more important than the future.

Flower said:

You are normal , just different <3 from others without lupus. I have made peace with the fact a lot of my "Dreams " I have to change to accommodate lupus. I have so desperately wanted to own my own business a bookstore .. I sell used books on Amazon it is very small sales like 3 books a month and sometimes that is too much. I wanted also to train dogs for the blind (this is at different times in my life) I now dog sit my daughters dogs. Much different from my original dreams however I can manage this so far. If you can let go and heal your body then look for smaller more manageable dreams!!
I wish the very best for you and send you a big hug
Terri

Hi, I spent the whole week going through all my medical records one by one (very strenuous and im so paying for it this weekend ugh) but hopefully it will be worth it when it comes time to prove myself. This time I do not have a lawyer. My previous case I did, and they didn't do as much as ive already done, plus obviously I lost the case, so I hope relying on myself and my mother to help me straighten things out will be enough.

Lupancatwoman said:

Josie,

What a story you have. Seems like you have documented your issues very well. Do you have a disability attorney going with you to the hearing or are you going it alone?

All the best,

LupanCatwoman

Bello!There are stories like your’s , and Yes LUPUS life , Is something-smile. This Is my 3rd year and i have come far from when it starter , and man am happy! It to ok me time to Seattle the ideal of letrina things go and changeing my Life total ley just so that LUPUS could Fit in M sound coraza Richter? But hang in There and don,t vive up say on top as much as posible most of all Kenia that you are Never Alone…Beverly L.