Having trouble getting myself to work, how do you deal with this?

I am a Canadian and I am wondering, is there any help available from the government? I am having more and more BAD days and my employer is getting fed up with my missed days? Can anyone give me any advice on this?

Catharine,

I am sorry, I feel your pain. Most days I have this crazy conversation in my head convincing myself that I need to get out of bed and get to work. It just sucks. One thing that I have done at my job is I have gotten an Intermittent Leave of Absence. It is is part of the Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA) It allows you to take time here and there as needed and it protects you and your job. I don't know if this helps because I live in the US, there could be a similar program in Canada. Good Luck and know you are not alone.

Julie

Have you talked to your employer about your illness? Is there any understanding of sympathy? Is he/she capable of working with you to find a solution? Does your company have an Employee Assistance Plan that you can access? The answers to this may all be no and that is very frustrating and disheartening. Even if you can get some understanding and assistance at work I would suggest you try some of the suggestions below. It can't hurt.

I would suggest talking to your doctor or rheumatologist about this. He or she may know of programs or assistance. If that doesn't get you anywhere try Service Canada or provincial disabilities association or Lupus association. It probably depends on which province you are in what help may be available. Most cities will have some kind of employment agencies that may be able to put you in the right direction.

Good luck with getting some help. If nothing else, talk to us here. Marion

lHi there Catherine, i am so sorry you are having such a tough time of it right now. I remember when i used to go to work and needed time off you could see not just the boss was unhappy about it, but my collegues as well. I think they seemed to think i was having some sort of holiday while i was off and not feeling well. I am sorry i dont know how things work out there, as i live in the Uk. But are there any form of like a Social Services system say for people who are permenantly not well or disabled, elderly etc, because if you call them they might be able to help let you knnow what help you can get. Also some goverment systems will pay say 6 months of the interest on your mortgage to take the pressure off until things get abit easier, i know a few countries do this, but not alot of people know about it. When i had to go on benefits i was totally clueless, as i had worked all my life. When i was laid off for being sick, the company i worked for had put me on part time to help me, but i wasnt really even working that long in the end because i was so ill, so they said they had to let me go they werent exactly sacking me, but they said they thought i should leave and sort my health out. Anyway when i went to get some help i thought i had to go to the job centre to get help, it was all so confusing. In the end i got there though. Everything seems so hard work when we dont feel good. Another thing is there any type of voluntary organisation or advice bureau where you might be able to find these things out. In our town we have whats called a Citizens Advice Bureau where they have some very experienced people who know whats out there as help goes, and what extra things can be done for people like yourself. I was just wondering, it was just a thought, because everyone's circumstances are different. Anyway i wish you luck with it all, and maybe someone else on here who is Canadian might be able to enlighten you, i do hope so. Anyway nice to meet you, take care, bye for now, love and hugs Astrid40xoxo

Thanks for all your help, I guess I start gathering info and filling out papers, wish me luck!

GOOD LUCK CATHARINE~~~ HOPE IT ALL WORKS OUT POSITIVELY FOR YOU!! I WILL KEEP U IN MY THOUGHTS & PRAYERS!! STAY STRONG & KEEP SMILING!! :0) SUZIE

I would think that Canada would have law like the US where your employer cannot harass you for missing work if you are really sick. You might ask your doctor to write a letter to put in your file too...here in the US if your doctor writes a letter like stating you cannot work overtime. THey cannot have you working over time than...

You must have dept of labor in the Canadian government...i would contact them. You might have like us...where each state has their own than there is the federal government that also has dept of labor. We also have the disabilities act law...thank god for that...has helped so many people who are ill but still trying to work.

I tried...to keep working and was lucky to have employer that really worked with me. But eventually after I had worked their about 20 years and was down to 3 days per week...but had full benefits...i called it quits. I realized i was going to end up in hospital sick as dog...i was just so tired all the time and would cry on my way to work.

So my husband said leave it...after much thought i did....but now..i wish i had asked my doctor for some stronger pain medication. I just hurt so much..when you are tired as well...just wipes you out...

So talk to your doctor how you are feeling ....they should have some information as well what you can do.

GOOD luck ..i know how horrible it is to have them give you hard time...one boss there did...had me in tears...and i hated crying at work. funny story.i was being diagnosed...i lived over 40 min from work...my doctor was hour from work. Well they just told me they thought it was cancer...but not sure what kind but it was growing /spreading fast...i got nodules from lupus attacking connective tissue...eventually they figured that out with all the tests...

so back i thik it is cancer... i called my boss and said i am too upset to come in..plus by time i got there i have only like hour till i have to turn around and drive home...so take entire day as sick leave. ihad 6 weeks of sick leave so was not even close to using that much. Well he gave me hard time...i ended up crying..i was about to because of being told i have cancer...so in bedroom laying down crying..next thing i hear is my husband yelling at my boss!

My boss never again gave me hard time!! I thought he had got me fired...instead...my boss who back than was part of old boys network..i was like only woman in that dept...so he just did not know how to handle me...said that he n my husband had a nice talk ...and from now on i should take all the time i need! swear this happen... Poor guy....he had a stroke...that same place so nice to me...gave him very hard time. He kind of was over his head as a boss.

well hoped that made you laugh.....sounds like others gave you some excellent adivice...

i just feel bad..no boss should do that..so stressful as it is to be sick..but than to worry about being sick and missing work...agh!! not right!! that is no win situation...stress is going to make you sick....work will since it will over tire you..you cannot win. Please get your doctor to help you ASAP!! good luck!!

I just wanted to say I really enjoy being part of this family, well as it get more difficult for me getting out of bed every day ar 4am to start work at 6am it's hard. I support my house not married have a fiance but thats no help. well yes i get herrased by my boss to and i have FMLA. i work as a nurse assistant for the county of Los Angeles its not easy as we dont pay in to no disability so when i miss work i dont get paid ,they have disability like Colonial,Aflac but the dont cover me because of my Lupus and Fibromalagia it does noy cover HELP LOl.
dietsister said:

Catharine,

I am sorry, I feel your pain. Most days I have this crazy conversation in my head convincing myself that I need to get out of bed and get to work. It just sucks. One thing that I have done at my job is I have gotten an Intermittent Leave of Absence. It is is part of the Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA) It allows you to take time here and there as needed and it protects you and your job. I don't know if this helps because I live in the US, there could be a similar program in Canada. Good Luck and know you are not alone.

Julie

I had to smile, because I too get out of bed at 5 to work at 7:30 and I live 3 blocks from work! Everyone thinks I’m nuts, but takes a long hot shower and lots of time to get my body going.